Comforting Families Through Pregnancy Loss
2 Corinthians 1:4
IF YOU KNOW SOMEONE EXPERIENCING PREGNANCY LOSS:
When a friend or family member experiences a pregnancy loss, their entire world gets turned upside down. They will not get the opportunity to snuggle with their baby, they will not get to make memories with their baby, or watch their baby as they achieve all of the hopes & dreams they envisioned for him/her. They might not be able to express their thoughts or feelings in words and at times their grief may become unbearable. They have tons of questions but don't know how to ask them. Their faith is probably shaken and they are unsure of what to do next. They need love, comfort, & support. They need you.
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The very first thing you can do is acknowledge that their loss is real. Their baby may have been 6 weeks old or even 6 months old. No matter the age of the baby, no matter if they took a breath on earth or not, their baby is a real person and the loss of that person is real. There will be lots of crying, they will experience the different stages of grief and they might even want to have a ceremony to honor their baby. Please honor their wishes and encourage them to do what they feel is best physically, mentally, and spiritually.
There are many different positive and uplifting ways for you to be involved throughout the process of a pregnancy loss. Below we have outlined several different things to consider, as well as, resources to refer to throughout the process. If you have any questions please feel free to reach out and we would love to help in anyway we are able.
HERE ARE SOME HELPFUL THINGS TO SAY AND DO:
DO:
SAY:
"I am here for you."
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Send a "I'm thinking" of you card.
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Make a meal for their family.
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Call or text to check in with them from time to time especially during sensitive times. (ex. Mother's day, baby's due date, Father's Day, etc.)
"I'm sorry for your loss."
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Simply acknowledge her loss.
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Purchase flowers
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Purchase a rembrance item (Bracelet, Pin, Necklace, Journal, Bible, figurine, stuffed animal, etc.)
SAY:
DO:
SAY:
DO:
"I will help you."
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Offer to clean their house or run errands.
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Start a meal train to prepare meals for a week or more.
"Whatever you may think, you did nothing to deserve this or cause
this to happen."
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​If you had a miscarriage share your experience with them.
SAY:
DO:
SAY:
Say: "Take the time you need to heal. Everyone grieves differently.
"I know this is extremely difficult, and I am here to listen when you are ready to talk."
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Let them share their story with you; including all of the details.
It is nice to talk with someone in order to help process all of the thoughts and emotions they are experiencing. It is especially helpful if they talk with someone who has also experienced pregnancy loss so they are able to create a connection and not feel so alone.